To The Newaygo High School Class of 2015,

Listen, the blog this week is different. I attended a High School graduation last week, and my 10 year class reunion is happening this summer. I’m feeling the need to reach backward, float amongst that nostalgia for a while, while stretching the muscles, and cracking the joints of my creative writing brain. So with that, this is what would happen if I were invited back to my high school graduation to speak to my emerging adult classmates as my current 28 year old self. 

I close my eyes, inhale the scent of early summer sun radiating off of the black tarmac and dark green grass. The crowd in the steal bleachers is hushed with the exception of a few restless little siblings and grown relatives fanning themselves with the all black and white Newaygo High School class of 2015 Graduation programs. I open my eyes as our principle, Mrs. Knight speaks my name into the microphone, and I slowly step forward in my crinkly white robe. I smile at the class of 149 students seated before me as I stand confidently at the podium. 

“Good evening, everyone,” I speak with a smile and confidence I don’t remember having when I sat out in those seats. “It is an honor to be here today. Thank you so much to the administration for inviting me here today and to the class of 2015 for hearing me out. I know this must be strange for you. It is for me too. I have a lot of jumbled up feelings about this place and these people. I have a lot of pretty awful memories here, but I also have some that I will treasure for the rest of my life and that I look back on with a smile often. 

“I’ll be honest, I will always feel a little cheated out of a seat in the top ten of our class. I busted my butt in school and got really good grades after many nights studying through sobs and overthinking every piece of homework. Some of you took classes that weighted your GPA in your favor and academically put you ahead of me, but I would be willing to bet money that when you get to be my age, 99% of you will be able to honestly say you’ve never used anything you learned in those classes once. I decided to take a year and a half of graphic design at the tech center, which did not weigh my GPA, but I use what I learned there literally everyday in my working career. High school me was livid that the B+ I got in gym class and lack of honors math classes kept me from one of those top ten seats some of you are sitting in. Current me is so grateful that she followed her heart. 

“While my high school self may have felt envious of some of you, current me, the one who lives independently, has a job she loves, is making a positive impact in her community, has discovered faith and purpose, and who has family and friends that she adores, she doesn’t care about my high school GPA even a little bit. In fact, when I look at pictures of myself crossing this stage 10 years ago, I feel a great sense of pride for that smiling, big, brown-eyed future CMU Chippewa. The girl who walked across that stage was about to be a first generation college student, and even though I had zero idea what I was doing most of the time, I got through it. Before I even stepped foot on this stage in my cap and gown, there were so many silent battles I fought to get to that moment. After graduation though, I not only survived, I thrived. I found a version of myself that I never really felt had freedom to step out in front of people. High school kept her confined and bottled up. Insecure. Unsure. Afraid.

“After I left this town, I found a me that was so excited to be exactly who she was at the moment and who found joy in discovering who she became as she grew, as she made mistakes, as she hurt, as she fell down and then pushed back up. I found a me that loved to create, to sing, to teach, to laugh, to dance, to listen, to exist without shame.

“All of this to say, and please, Newaygo High School staff and faculty don’t take offense to this, but so much of what you’ve endured the last 4 years doesn’t matter even a little. If you have felt beat down and trapped in this town where your teachers knew your parents before you showed up to their classroom, I have really wonderful news for you; You have the rest of the world waiting for you. You have the opportunity to be anything you want to be, do anything you want to do, and I think the best thing you can ever possibly be is the you-est version of you. That’s what the world truly needs. If you didn’t feel like you could find that here, that’s okay. I felt similarly. But eventually, I found her. 

“There is a whole universe out there, ready to welcome your exploration. If you’re sitting here right now and you think you know yourself, you don’t. High school has this way of seeming like an entire world in and of itself, but my friend, take heart, because the world is much bigger than where you are sitting. Outside of this football field are your people, your community, the people who will love and understand the best and worst parts of you. Outside of this town are problems that need your help being solved. There are dreams that you don’t even have yet waiting to be discovered. There are laughs and memories that you will clutch close to your heart that you don’t even have context for yet. There is a hope outside of this space and time that is beyond any gift or set of advice I could give you, but you have to be the one to find that. I can’t find it for you. 

“You are going to fail. A lot. You’re going to hurt people, intentionally or unintentionally. You’re going to have bad days. You’re going to be lonely. You’re going to get sick. You’re going to feel let down and betrayed. That’s all a part of the human experience. However, being human doesn’t stop there. Because someday your sister will give birth to your tiny 7lb miracle of a niece, and those will be the most beautiful eyes you’ve ever looked into. You will meet some of the greatest people you’ll ever meet. You will be encouraged by powerful voices you haven’t even heard yet. You will laugh so hard at something that only you and a friend that knows you better than anyone find funny, but that laughter will cramp your stomach and make your eyes water. You will get to watch friends fall in love and find the happiest version of themselves. You will probably fall in love, and my friend, there is nothing that can properly describe what that does to your mind, body, heart, and soul, but it’s unreal. 

“You’re going to drive across the bridge over the Muskegon River and through downtown Newaygo some day, and you’ll lose your breath at the beauty that’s here and be overwhelmed at how much of that you missed while you were growing up, as much as you so desperately want out of this place right now. Someday you’ll be in a very adult situation and recall something your favorite teacher spoke to you many years ago that will help you find the courage to keep going. I wouldn’t be who I am without the adults here that invested in me, set positive examples for me, and taught me the human lessons that existed outside of the textbook. So if you get the chance, before you walk away and celebrate with your families and friends tonight, hug and thank the teachers that meant something to you. Their jobs are really hard, and you matter a lot to them. 

“There’s a whole life out there waiting for most of us. Go find you. Be that you, the most authentic and genuine version of you that you can be, and please in all things, turn to love. In anger, in joy,  in triumph, and in defeat, choose love. Thank you class of 2015, though I won’t see or speak to the majority of you in my adult life, I’m grateful for the impact you had on me, and I wish the best for all of you.

“Never forget that you are truly and deeply loved.”